A Hidden Crisis
Romance scams occur when con artists pose as potential partners online, win trust, and eventually exploit victims financially. According to a recent FBI IC3 report, U.S. victims lost over $650 million to romance schemes in 2023—more than any other internet crime category. While public narratives have centered on female victims, male victims—particularly older men—are disproportionately impacted and often suffer in silence, scammed out of six-figure sums.
Local Warning: Winnebago County, Wisconsin
On July 22, 2025, the Winnebago County Sheriff’s Office issued a public advisory after several residents, including elderly men, reported losing money in romance scams initiated via social media, often escalating to encrypted messaging apps like Telegram or WhatsApp. These scammers, posing as seemingly caring correspondents, frequently encourage victims to pull conversations off public platforms—an early tactic to isolate and manipulate.
A Case in Sun City Center
On July 17, 2025, Observer News detailed the ordeal of a resident in Sun City Center who lost “hundreds of thousands” to a romance scam that began in 2022. An elderly man fell for a narrative spun by an alleged woman who messaged him unsolicited, forming a bond that led to regular financial transfers—mistaking romance for rescue.
Organized Crime at Scale
These aren’t isolated scams—they’re part of coordinated global operations. In June 2025, a Texas-based ring laundering $17 million through romance, business email, and investment scams received sentences ranging between 109 and 480 months. This syndicate targeted vulnerable elderly Americans, both male and female, funneling profits through high-pressure relationships.
Similarly, a federal case in Houston saw two individuals convicted for a romance scam conspiracy totaling over $3 million—one sentenced to 188 months, the other to 121 months in prison.
The Grooming Process
These scams often begin with harmless flirtation followed by emotional intimacy—or “love bombing”—and evolve into financial pleas. According to expert sources, what starts as compliments and companionship gradually shifts to requests for money, often disguised as visa fees, medical bills, or emergency travel costs.
Special Agent Christine Beining from the FBI explains: “These scammers don’t just steal money—they build emotional dependency,” particularly targeting men in their 40s to 60s who may possess considerable savings.
Psychological and Technological Manipulation
Romance scammers employ both psychological and technological tactics. They utilize stolen or AI-generated images, scripted personas, and deepfake videos to enhance credibility—and compassion. They isolate victims from friends and family by insisting on secrecy or private messaging, reinforcing manipulation.
A CBS News investigation uncovered a Ghana-based syndicate operating “boiler rooms” where victims—often older American men—were systematically targeted and financially drained. CBS reported that men are less likely to report scams due to “deep shame”.
The Human Toll
Male victims experience more than financial loss. Isolation, severe depression, and in some cases suicidal ideation, are common consequences. One story shared by The Cut recounted a widower who spent $45,000 on a fabricated online relationship, buying costly message credits without dialogue ever happening in person.
Another CBS feature highlighted a single victim from Ghana who lost $700,000 and described men as “easier to trap and less likely to report” CBS News. These cases highlight the emotional devastation: trust destroyed and savings wiped out.
Tactics and Red Flags
Common Warning Signs:
- Refusal to video chat or meet in person.
- So-called emergencies asking for urgent payments (for medical, travel, legal needs).
- Requests for cryptocurrency, wire transfers, gift cards.
- Love-bombing followed by quick financial asks.
These hallmarks are consistent with advice from the FTC, FBI, and Homeland Security Investigations (HSI)
Pig‑Butchering Variant:
A growing subtype involves investment scams disguised as romance. Victims are “fattened” with affection, then coaxed into crypto investments. Once the money is gone, scammers vanish. This method has spread globally, often involving human trafficking networks pressing individuals into scam production.
Law Enforcement and Prevention
Law enforcement agencies have intensified efforts:
- ICE/HSI launched a national awareness campaign and has urged victims to report scams—offering anonymity and intelligence-gathering aid.
- The FBI and FTC offer online resources and warnings across official websites.
- District-level prosecutions, such as the Houston case, have resulted in lengthy prison sentences for scammers and money launderers
Breaking the Silence
Experts emphasize education and destigmatization:
- Clinical psychologist Dr. Marcy Bloom notes that male victims face profound shame, which prevents reporting and healing.
- Victim support groups and hotlines refer to a shared emotional experience: “I was human, and I fell in love,” says one scam survivor.
Romance scams don’t discriminate—but male victims are uniquely vulnerable due to social stigma and financial risk. The emotional aftermath can linger long after the money is gone.
Toward Awareness and Empathy
Romance scams targeting men often involve emotional mazes far more damaging than standard financial fraud. These scams exploit romantic yearning and societal expectations to devastating effect. As global operations expand, so must our vigilance and compassion.
Law enforcement continues to crack down, but the fault line remains in public awareness—particularly among male victims who feel compelled to maintain silence. If a friend or loved one seems emotionally or financially tied to someone they’ve never met, start a conversation.
The path to healing begins by turning quiet heartbreak into shared stories—and collective defense.
horrible to see the way people treat each other!
As a single guy in my 40s, I never thought I’d fall for a romance scam. Seeing this article hit home—especially about the emotional manipulation. It’s reassuring to know men aren’t alone and we’re not weak. Thank you for the empathy.
This stigma around men feeling ashamed is real. I lost thousands while trying to help someone I thought cared. The isolation that followed was worse than the loss. We need more stories like this to break silence.
My brother was targeted pretty hard—she spun stories, asked for money, and even video‑called when ‘travel plans’ came up. None of us knew what to do. This article gives us language to support him better.
need more like this! Men are victims pretty often, they just hesitate to come forward because of pride.
Men need to keep their eyes open, some of these women be shady
I was watching a netflix show about catching scammers. They only had one of the episodes deal with a man being scammed and it was really a lot less coverage than the women. They said most men are not coming forward because of shame. The only ones being shamed should be the scammers!!!
This article really hit me hard. People don’t realize how devastating these scams are until it happens to someone close.
$650 million lost in a year is insane. And like you said, most men don’t even report it. The real number must be way higher.
Scary but true.
Great job shining a light on something nobody likes to talk about. Men get scammed too, and the shame factor makes it even worse.
I know someone personally who went through this. He lost money, but what really broke him was the betrayal and embarrassment. Took years to rebuild his confidence.
This actually happened to my uncle.
Can’t believe people fall for this… but then again, I kind of can.
The AI/deepfake part is terrifying.
More people need to read this.
Shame keeps guys quiet, 100%.
Sad but important topic.
Short and simple: If someone you’ve never met asks for money, it’s a scam. Period.
Brenda –
The part about scammers using AI and deepfakes really worries me. Technology keeps giving them new tools while the average person falls further behind in spotting the tricks.
Men in their 40s–60s are especially at risk. They often have some savings, maybe they’re lonely, and scammers know how to exploit that. I appreciate the article calling this out.
I agree that prevention is just as important as punishment. Jail sentences don’t stop new scammers from popping up, but education and awareness might.
It’s crazy how common this is now.
Good reminder to stay cautious online.
Hard to read, but very real.
This article makes me think dating apps should be doing more. A simple warning message or safety guide could probably save people from falling into these traps.
Thank you for addressing the emotional side of this. It’s not just about money — it’s about trust, dignity, and mental health. That’s what gets destroyed the most.